Play-by-Post: Match 04 Round 04

10 === Screen Actors Guild vs. Venture Bros === 10

Hank (4) - Dean (7) - George Clooney (13) - Brock (14) - Christian Bale (15) - Val Kilmer (19) - Dr Venture (20) - Adam West (20)


Hank Venture
spawns in Location 3, and beguiles mayor Adam West before grabbing the Periapt of Animal Charming!
Dean Venture is punished for his poor limerick by the Court of stars.
Dean Venture is BLOODIED!
Dean Venture starts his turn in quicksand, but gives up an action point to Adam West to escape, before attacking Christian Bale.
Christian Bale is CRITICALLY GIBBED!
George Clooney starts his turn in the Dancing Hut, and fails to appease the Court of Stars
George Clooney is UNCONSCIOUS and SELF-GIBBS!
George Clooney respawns and attacks Dr. Venture, before using a petrifying gaze from the Hag's Potion.
Dr. Venture is UNCONSCIOUS
Hank Venture is STONE-GIBBED!
Brock Venture jumps out of the dancing hut and attacks George Clooney.
George Clooney is knocked UNCONSCIOUS!
Christian Bale respawns in Location 1, and attacks Dr. Venture
Dr. Venture is GIBBED
Dean Venture is HUT-GIBBED!
Val Kilmer starts his turn in the Hut, before stepping out and sending an arrow flying wild, before shooting a second at Brock.
Dr. Venture Spawns in location 3 and attacks George Clooney and Adam West.
George Clooney is GIBBED!
Dr. Venture is BLOODIED!
Adam West Self-GIBBS!
Adam West respawns in Location 4, and is HUMILIATED!
Brock is GIBBED!


  1. Round 4, Fight!

    And don't forget to start out your turn with a song worthy of the Court of Stars!

  2. Just wanted to quickly mention that, although it may seem trivial, the comment at the end of each round linking to the next is very handy.

  3. @Dean: I hope you choke and die in quicksand.

    @Hank: COME AT ME BRO!

  4. Oh, just to give everyone a heads up, my posting may slow down a bit over the weekend. I'll be traveling, and won't always have access to a computer or the internet, so my post response time (which I've tried to keep very low) may stretch out a bit. I figured I'd apologize in advance.

    So...yes, just wanted to warn everyone.

  5. Before Hank can reappear, two minions appear and begin to bust a dope sound. As they finish, Hank appears in his Batman regalia.


    "I am the bat."

    He turns to Adam West pointing his hands and makes a series of non-sensical gestures instructing him to go walk next to that Diakka and attack his friend, Christian Bale.

    "The night is mine!"

    Standard Action: Charm of Misplaced Wrath on Adam West, +5 vs. Will (use Memory of a Thousand Lives adding d6 to roll if needed and would work), on hit slide to square D2 and he makes basic attack against Christian Bale with +2 to damage roll.
    ACTION POINT: Beguiling Strands upward against Adam West and Diakka next to him, +5 vs Will (+2 against Adam if he is a dazed target). On hit, 5 damage (diakka makes attack if hit) and then push Adam West to square D14 into quicksand.
    On hit, trigger Essence of Death, I take d6 necrotic damage (which I resist 5 necrotic) and Adam takes d12 necrotic damage
    Move Action: walk to E6
    Minor Action: Pick up Necklace.
    Free Action: Spread cape like bat and stand in awkward, awkward silence.

  6. The Court of Stars, while initially dismissive of Hank Venture's song, were unable to keep a straight face through the whole thing.


    Charm of Misplaced Wrath
    1d20(19)+5=24 vs Will 11 [HIT]
    Adam West is dazed & makes a basic attack against Christian Bale
    1d20(18)+9-2(prone)=25 vs AC 15 [HIT]
    Damage: 1d10(2)+7=9 damage to Christian Bale
    Christian Bale is at 4HP!

    Action Point
    Beguiling Strand
    Adam: 1d20(8)+5 +2 (dazed)= 15 vs Will 11 [HIT]
    Diakka: 1d20(15)+5=20 vs Will 9 [HIT]
    Adam takes 5+1d12(2)=7 damage
    Diakka taks 5 damage & attacks. 1d20(3)+6+2(dazed)=11 vs Reflex 17 [MISS]
    Adam takes 5 damage on a miss

    Adam takes 12 damage total, bringing him to 14 HP!

    Saving Throw vs being pushed into Quicksand: 1d20(16) [SUCCESS]
    Adam West is prone in square D15!

    Hank takes 1d6(5)-5(resist)=0 damage!

    Hank grabs a necklace!

    Dean starts his turn sinking in Quicksand!

  7. Dancing Hut turns towards 2d16(2)(7)=B7 and moves 1d8(3) squares!

  8. I'll probably take damage for this but WTH:

    "There once was a hero named Dean Venture,
    who appeared in the body of a drow avenger.
    Though the batmans were many
    he swore I'll kill plenty
    and raise two fingers and say go Team Venture"

    "Helper get me out of here. I'm sick of these darn quick sands."


    Free Action: Auto escape and shift to B13. Other team gets an action point.
    Move Action: Move to H5
    Minor Action: Pick up Scourge of the Spider Queen.
    Standard Action: Use Shielded by Faith against Christian Bale.

    Attack: +9 Vs. AC (+4/+3Prof/+2Mag)
    Damage: 2d12+8 (4/+2mag/+2Aspect of Might)
    Effect: Until End of next turn I gain +2 to defenses against attacks made by creatures other than target.

  9. Dancing hut moves south west

  10. The Court of Stars looks at each other in Stunned Silence. Verenestra, the Oak Princess, is the first to speak. "Did...did he just try to rhyme "Venture" with "Venture?"

    BOO!! They cry out in unison!

    Dean Venture takes 15 damage, and is bloodied at 12HP.

    1d4(4) = Adam West gains an action point!

    Dean rushes over and grabs the scourge, before flailing Christian Bale.
    1d20(20)+9=29 [CRITICAL HIT]
    Damage: 24+8+2d8(7)(1)=40 Damage + 10 ongoing poison(save ends)!


    Dean takes 10 damage from Stormhawk's Vengeance!

    The Dancing Hut moves 1d8(3) squares

    George Clooney starts his turn in the Hut and takes 15 ongoing damage! (3 creatures in the Hut) George Clooney is Bloodied at 11HP!

  11. George clooney pops out of the dancing hut in clothes he was not wearing upon entering, and a banjo. Landing firmly on the ground in his dirty overalls and banjo, he looks about the field, paying witness to the bloodshed of the battlefield. He begins laying into his banjo a southern riff that tugs at your soul and belts out:


    "I am a man of constant sorrow
    I've seen trouble all my day.
    I bid farewell to old Kentucky
    The place where I was born and raised...."

    He turns towards Dean Venture and continues his song of sorrow, the notes causing Dean's soul to share in his pain:
    "Maybe your friends think I'm just a stranger
    My face you'll never see no more.
    But there is one promise that is given
    I'll meet you on God's golden shore...."

    After finishing with Dean, George Clooney hops back on the leg of the Baba-Yaga Hut, riding it away with the finishing lines:
    "It's fare thee well my old lover
    I never expect to see you again
    For I'm bound to ride that northern railroad
    Perhaps I'll die upon this train...."

    (out of order verses I know, but it fits better with my actions!)

    Free: Jump out of the hut
    Standard Action: Stone Blood Vs Dean
    +5 vs Fortitude; 1d6+5 damage
    If I miss and am within range, I use Adepts Insight (augmented) to add 1d4+1 to the attack.

    Minor: Hamadryad's Aspect - Wooden Form. I gain resist 5 all until EoNT.
    Move->Minor: Jump back in the hut, and grab Niad's Kiss
    Free Action: Use Niad's Kiss - I gain 20 THP

    Free Action: Climb to and sit on the porch of the Baba Yaga as I send it towards M10.

  12. The Court of Stars look at one another as the banjo starts playing. "It's kind of catchy..." Oran began saying, but the Prince of Frost simply rolled his eyes. "It was a bit catchy a decade ago. I wanted something more original..."

    George Clooney takes 15 damage!

    George Clooney is unconscious at -4hp!

    If you would like to self-gib and take your turn, you'll spawn in location 4. Else you can remain unconscious and get booted out of the Hut. Whichever you prefer

  13. Bah I say! He even sang the song!

    Fine, I'll respawn on 4, this changes things for me now...
    Move: Move to A14
    Standard: Beguiling Strands vs Dr. Venture
    +5 vs Will; 5 damage and push to K11
    If I miss and within range, use Free Action for Adept's Insight (augmented) for 1d4+1
    Minor Action: Take a drink out of the cauldron. I am trained in Dungeoneering.
    If I fail the save, and have not used Adept's Insight (augmented), use it here.

  14. George self-gibbs.


    Beguiling Strands 1d20(17)+5=23 vs Will 15 [HIT]

    Dr. Venture takes 5 damage and is knocked UNCONSCIOUS!

    The Hut moves 1d8(4) squares.

    Brick starts his turn in the hut and takes 10 damage!

  15. note: Map won't be updated til late this evening.

  16. Forgot the potion:

    Saving Throw: 1d20(10) [success]

    Hag's Favor: 1d6(3): Gaze of the cockatrice! Choose one Dungeoneer you can see. He must immediately make a saving Throw or be petrified!

    - The Hut's NW corner is in M10

  17. Not sure if Hank is alive or not, but it shouldn't matter.

    Evoking his barbarian heroes, Conan and Schwarzenegger, Brock recites the battle hymn of Crom. "Crush your enemies, see them driven before you, and hear the lamentation of the women!"


    Move action: attempt to escape (athletics +9)
    If that fails, escape as a free action and grant an action point.
    Free Action: exit hut at L10
    Minor Action: use Unseelie Curse vs Clooney
    +6 vs will
    Hit: -4 to all defenses, vulnerable 5 to damage (save ends both)

    Standard Action: charge to B13 using Howling Strike, with speed 10 (+2 Half-Orc, +2 Howling Strike)
    Wield Sun Sword two-handed
    +12 (5 +3prof. +1juggernaut, +2enh, +1 charge)+vs AC
    d8+d6+10 (+5 if Unseelie Curse hits)
    Hit: Use Furious Assault for extra d8 dmg
    Hit: Teleport him to D14.

    Note: For the charge, I'll have to cut the corner from B12 to C13. If this is a problem, I'll jump the corner as a part of the charge (+9). With a running start I should succeed, unless a 1 is an automatic failure.

    If the court finds me in favour, can I use my action point this round?

  18. Generally you can use Action Points in the same round that they are granted by crazy FTDM terrain effects, but you probably want to wait for Jon's die rolls before declaring how you want to use it anyways.

    By the way! You probably didn't know this, but at every live FTDM Tournament I wear thsi shirt: http://hamamori.com/sale_20386_470732085-What-Is-Best-In-Life-Conan-The-Barbarian-T-Shirt.htm

    That might be a good FTDM Dungeon Master's turn action, ask each dungeoneer: What is best in life?

    Most convincing War Face wins.

  19. That's awesome!

    Yes, I'll wait for the die rolls, and move the hut NW.

  20. Sorry, I was looking where the hut is on the map now. I'll move it towards K3.

  21. Saving Throw vs Petrification: 1d20(1) HUMILIATION!

    Hank Venture is turned into a pig and PETRIFIED!!

    I can't access YouTube at the moment, So I'll need to wait til later this evening before judging for the Court of Stars and posting the results for Brock's action.

  22. The Court of Stars applauds the musical styling of the Barbarian

    Brock gains an Action Point!

    Escape attempt: 1d20(12)+9=21 [SUCCESS]

    Unseelie Curse on George Clooney:
    1d20(19)+6=24 vs Will 13 [HIT]

    George Clooney takes a -4 penalty to defenses and vulnerable 5 (save ends)

    Charge vs George Clooney

    1d20(8)+12=20 vs AC 15-4 [HIT]
    Damage: 2d8(8)(1)+1d6(1)+10+5 (Vuln) = 25 Damage

    George Clooney is Unconscious with -1 HP.

    Brock takes 10 Damage, and is bloodied at 5 HP!

    The Hut moves NorthWest 1d8(6) squares!

    Christian Bale respawns in Location 1!

  23. So much unprofessionalism. Whatever. On with the scene. No, let's not take a fucking break, on with the fucking scene! Bale hulks up, looks his manliest, then quickly changes into an orange and white minidress with a Sailor collar and a blonde wig. He was going to have to shoot his agent after this, wasn't he? Whatever. Spotlight. Perfect. Sing!


    (Never ask me to sing. I WILL.)

    Come to think of it, why wait for his damn agent? Those fucking kids are STILL ON HIS SET.

    Move: Shift to J2
    Minor: Curse Dean
    Standard: Diabolic Grasp on Dr. Venture
    +7 vs Fort (I should be an equal distance from him as one of my allies after the shift, so Prime Shot should work. If not, it's +6.) If it misses, Heroic Effort
    On hit: 2d8+5 damage, and slide him to H10
    Send the hut towards H5

  24. Did Clooney teleport to D14?

  25. Assuming Clooney did teleport, and I can use my action point, I'd like to target Clooney and West with the Wand of Senaliesse (NE corner of my square to SE corner of West's).
    +10 vs Ref,+15 vs Clooney (juggernaut + unconscious), +12 vs West (juggernaut + dazed)
    4d6 radiant dmg (+5 vs Clooney)
    miss for half.

  26. George Clooney makes a saving throw against teleportation into hazardous terrain.
    1d20(15) [SUCCESS]
    I'll assume that Brock will not be using the wand against just one person, and will be saving his AP


    The Archfey of the Court of Stars look at each other curiously as Christian transforms. "Does anyone know what that was?"
    "Does anyone understand what was sung?"
    "Is anyone else slightly disturbed?"
    *hands raise*
    "On the other hand, that took guts. WE APPROVE!"

    Christian Bale gets an Action Point!

    Christian bale curses and attacks Dean Venture
    1d20(8)+7=15 vs Fort 12 [HIT]
    damage 2d8(3)(1)+5+1d6(curse)(2) =10 damage
    Saving throw vs Hazardous terrain: 1d20(20)
    Dean Venture is reduced to 2 HP & falls prone

    Dancing Hut moves 1d8(4) squares

    Val Kilmer takes 5 damage a the start of his turn in the Dancing Hut!

  27. Umm, Dean should be unconscious at this point...

    Court of Stars Failure:
    Dean Venture takes 15 damage, and is bloodied at 12HP.

    SHV for gibbing Bale:
    Dean takes 10 damage from Stormhawk's Vengeance! (should be at 2HP to start)

    then in that last post he takes 10 more damage. Unconscious at -8?

  28. @BFlat: Action Points can only be used on your turn.

  29. I asked Jon if I could use it at the end of my turn, but didn't get a response.

  30. Oh I see, in all the confusion (Jon is out of twon travelling at the moment) that must have slipped through the cracks and Christian Bale's turn came up.

    Speaking for Team S.A.G., I would think it only fair for Brock to be able to use the Action Point now, although he wouldn't be able to target Christian since Bale was not on the map at the time. As always, I bow to whatever ruling the Dungeon Master decrees.

    Mayor Adam West to Brock: COME AT ME BRO!!!

  31. yeah, you were fine to use it at the end of your turn, but Christian went ahead and posted. the AP would have triggered at the end of your turn, before Bale went; but since the teleport failed you didn't meet the criteria you had set up for your AP.

    And correct on Dean, I'd forgotten to update the "current HP status" spreadsheet.


  32. I totally understand why it was neglected, so no worries there. Also, I will hold off after seeing that Clooney didn't teleport. Next round, West...

  33. I also attacked a different person. ;) Dr., not dean.

    And yes, my interests and hobbies are varied and often strange. ;)

  34. Gonna wait to declare my AP until things get figured.

  35. ok,

    Christian attacks the unconscious Dr Venture:



    I'm actually going to say that you can't use an AP this round, since you already know that the Hut is going to hit Dean Venture (who would have been the most likely target). Since there was no mention of using the AP in the original post (as opposed to Hank, who posted his intention before knowing results), I'm going to ask you to save it.

    1. Indeed, no worries. My fault for forgetting an if clause. :)

      And Bale's singing is beautiful, don't make him trash your lights, Val! ;)

      Lol, the word verification is 'nogib'. I Disagree!

  36. My song is a ballad of love, geeky, geeky love. Between a girl, and the shaggy dwarf who saved her from horde of golems. You should listen all the way to the end for the best part.


    Val, grabs his bathrobe and steps from the hut grumbling, promising to call his agent about better accommodations and more bear claws. Hearing some god-awful singing he looks around and directs his ire at the burly one.

    Minor: Grab Wand of Senaliesse
    Free Action: Step out of hut at H6.
    Standard Clever Shot v Brock. +8 v AC, 1d10+5dmg and slid 2 squares to D13.
    Move: K9
    Hut to H8

    ..I think that's everything?

  37. Okay, so I was typing while other stuff got posted. I step out in a place from which I can shoot Brock. Same actions otherwise.

  38. BTW, Val Kilmer's attack bonus should be +9 (+5 Dex +2 proficiency +1 weapon talent +1 bow expertise), and Matt has emailed me telling me that if he gets an Action Point due to the Court of Stars' approval of his song, he will wait for his attacks to roll out before declaring if he's using it or not.


  39. The Court of stars exchanges looks. "Hmm...a simple tune, but entertaining."

    Val Kilmer gains an action point!

    Val Kilmer searches through the hut for the wand, unaware that Brock had already procured it earlier.

    stepping out of the hut, Val takes a shot towards Brock
    1d20(2)+9=11 vs AC 19 [MISS!] *something something hooche*

    I'll hold off on rolling for the Hut until after Matt's action point is declared, as spelled out by Casey. I'll update the map regardless

  40. Sorry for the lengthy delay, just got back from PA.
    As the wand was not in the hut, may I use a Minor? If so I take on the Aspect of the Dancing Serpent.
    Taking a second shot at Brock with Clever Shot again, same goal to slide to D13. Casey was right it's +9vAC, 1d10+5. It would then get +1atk and dmg for my Aspect.

  41. And of course don't forget my new bow +2atk and dmg right?

  42. As Val slips into a new stance that awkwardly resembles a python doing the tango, he lines another shot towards Brock:
    1d20(8)+9+2(enh)+1 (stance)=20 vs AC 19 [HIT]

    Damage: 1d10(9)+5+1+2=17 damage

    Brock is Unconscious with -12 HP!

    Saving throw to avoid the quicksand: 1d20(12)[SUCCESS!]

    The Hut moves 1d8(8) squares

    Dr. Venture spawns in Location 3!

  43. Hot Crap on a Cracker, this is getting confusing!

    Dr. Venture materializes in a confused state, severely concussed by the Guild's evil assault. The good doctor breaks out into song, singing the theme music to the cartoon following the Rusty Venture Show on saturday mornings...



    standard action: Hound of Dark Omen vs. Adam West +9 vs. Will (+6, +1 for Shadow Twist, +2 for CA)
    Hit: 2d8+5 psychic damage and push to C14. If he doesn't move before the end of my next turn he takes 5 psychic damage.

    If this hits and he is pushed C14, I will use an action point to use Argent Rain on B15. +6 vs. reflex Hit: 1d10+5 fire damage.
    Effect: zone until end of my next turn. Creatures entering or ending their turn there takes 5 fire damage.

    If Adam West is dropped I'll activate Dark Reaping.

    Send the hut to K9.

  44. "I don't know about the rest of you, but I'd watch that show." The Prince of Frost mutters.

    Adam West gains an Action Point!

    attack vs Adam West's will
    1d20(2)+9=11 vs Will 11 [HIT]
    Damage: 2d8(7)(4)+5=16 damage

    Saving Throw 1d20(8) [FAILURE]

    Adam West goes into the Quicksand

    Ardent Rain!
    1d20(16)+6 vs George's Reflex [hit]
    1d20(14)+6 vs Adam's Reflex [hit]
    Damage: 1d10(8)+5=13 damage

    George Clooney is Gibbed!
    Adam West is Unconscious!

    Dr. Venture takes 20 damage from Stormhawk's Vengence!

    Dr. Venture is bloodied at 3HP

    Hut moves to 1d8(7) & pushes Val Kilmer towards a bush!

    Adam West Self-Gibbs and spawns in Location 4!

  45. Did I save against immobilized?

  46. Save vs immobilized: 1d20(4) [FAILURE]

  47. Looks like all of my lingering conditions have been cleared off, which is nice. I don't often get my full set of actions.

    Mayor Adam West looks around at all the furrowed brows, all the tense countenances, all the anger, all the hate. Soon,he breaks out into song.

    Fellas, fellas! We're just playing a game. The most deadly game. But we can't go through life so unhappy!

    We have to keep things light.

    We have to keep things happy.

    We have to keep it gay."


    MINOR ACTION: Go into Stance of the Dancing Serpent.

    STANDARD ACTION: Attack the swedish murder-machine, Brock Sampson, with Disruptive Strike.

    Attack: +10 vs. AC 12 (+9 base +2 combat advantage from cunning stalker -2 ranged vs. prone +1 dancing serpent)
    AC reduced to 12 due to unconscious
    Hit: 1d10+6 damage and immobilized (save ends).
    Miss: If within 4, use Heroic Surge to hit.
    Super Miss: Half damage and slowed until end of my next turn.

    MOVE ACTION: Move to E5.

    ACTION POINT: (Gained from Dean's escape) Attack Dr. Venture with Fomorian King.

    Attack: +6 vs. Reflex 15
    Hit: 1d10+7 damage and Dr. Venture is restrained until escape (DC 21).
    Miss: If I still have Heroic Effort and miss AND am within 4, use it to hit.

    BABA YAGA'S HUT: Send towards square C3.

  48. The Court of Stars watches in horror. "Oh...I was expecting 'The Producers'..." "The only thing that saves it is the hip gyrations. Also, Kirk Sucks, Picard rules and this proves it!"

    Adam West gains an action point!

    Adam west moves into the Black Mamba Mambo stance, and takes a shot at the Unconscious Brock Sampson
    Attack: 1d20(1)+10=11 vs AC 12 [HUMILIATION!]

    Adam West is turned into a Pig!

    Since Pigs can't attack, I'll assume you save the action point

    The Dancing Hut moves 1d8(2) squares

    The Court of Stars makes the following Proclamation:

    All Daily Powers can be used as At-Wills for the next round!

  49. Darn the luck!!!

    Brock still takes half-damage and is slowed, for what it's worth.

  50. Half Damage: 1d10(9)+6=15/2=7 damage. Brock is GIBBED!

    Hank Venture spawns in Location 3!

    New Post is available here: http://fourthcoreteamdeathmatch.blogspot.com/2012/01/play-by-post-match-04-round-05.html