So begins Round 1 of a tournament for the ages. Eight would-be champions have answered the call for a chance at glory and immortality. Whose voice will be chanted over-and-over as they stand triumphant?

The Knights of Spamalot?

Sir Robin's Minstrel (20): a human sporting chain, a longsword and a wand
The Mighty Rabbit of Caerbannog (12): a human (apparently), wielding a longsword, a shortsword and hide armour
Sir Lancelot (7): a Dwarf who wields, besides his vast manhood, a mordenkrad and hide armour
The Brave Sir Robin (5): A Genasi, armed with his dagger and orb of extra courage, and fine robes of cloth to cover his inner terror.

Or Team WetwORCs?
Teddy-Sin (17): the first of four Half-Orcs, wielding two short-swords stained red with blood of countless humans and leather armour
Gaarish (15): who wields a mighty warhammer and armour made from an entire oxen's hide.
Ugarth (14): a pretty ugly figure, even for a Half-Orc, with an execution axe and hide armour

Urk (2): a Half-Orc used to the finer things, he sports a rod, spiked gauntlet and fine chain. 

A disembodied applause sounds as our first dungeoneer takes the field, knowing that death and mayhem are sure to follow.

Sir Robin's Minstrel is up!


  1. Robin's Minstrel appears and there was much rejoicing. I will float down to H11 and activate dirge of the damned and song of savagery.

    1. Robin's Minstrel sings and dances a merry jig, with a fie fie, fiddle dee dee.

      Teddy-Sin is up.

      Map updated.

    2. Of course it might help if the DM places the next dungeoneer on the map. Teddy-Sin spawns in location 2.

  2. Replies
    1. I agree, but where is the quintessentially fourthcore Black Knight?

    2. He can't type, his arm's off!

    3. And Siri probably wouldn't work too well in Medieval wherever the heck that was supposed to be...

  3. "I come to this game to fight the best and bravest, and I show up to fight a minstrel? A MINSTREL?" Teddy moves off the platform, sees he can fly, then charges downward, yelling "RED CYCLONE!"

    Fly to D12 as a move action.
    Standard action: Charge down to G12 and attack Robin's Minstrel with a ninja-to rush.
    +11 vs AC (+8 + 1 for charging +2 for CA..I get it for flying and using ninja-to rush). Damage: 1d6+5 + 5 from attacking from a higher sq + 1d8 from venom hand assassin + 1d6 from furious assault + 1d8 from attack finesse+ 1d10 from assassin's strike.
    Seeing as I don't know how many hp the minstrel has, use VHA and FA dice for sure. Then add atk finesse 1d8 and AS 1d10 as needed.

    Oh so glad all those dice come back after a short rest. Also, would like to publically state my poison: Ungal Dust. I will also just go ahead and assume the DM will NOT let me use it to knock a target unconscious UEoE....

    1. VHA can only be used once until you short rest, so technically it will not refresh on respawn as per FTDM overview (respawn does not equal short rest).

      Care to revise?

      Also, no dice on the Ungal Dust, as unconscious dungeoneers can self-gib anways. Nice try, though ;)

    2. Well, VHA goes off on the first hit with a weapon. Will save assassins strike though. Figured I would state the obvious B. roll it!

  4. Wait, no strike that. Use Asn's strike if needed. It is specifically mentioned on the char gen tab that it refreshes upon respawn (I had thought so).

    1. Alright then.

      With a mighty roar, Teddy-Sin falls with all of his might upon the poor unsuspecting minstrel.


      Ninja-To Rush vs Sir Robin's Minstel
      11+(10)=21 vs AC 16, for a supreme (1)+10+(5 VHA)+(2 FA)+(6 AF)+(8 AS)=32, leaving the minstrel a bloody dying pulp at -6. He is then pushed 5 squares, lands in L6 and takes an additional 11 damage, for the gib.

      OOC: You ended up needing them all anyways.

      A rather slender looking Gaarish teleports in at location 2.

      Map updated. Sorry about the resolution. The screen caps will look better when I use my much larger work monitor.

    2. And disregard the "dying" under Robin's Minstrel. He dead. I'll update that tomorrow.

  5. Gaarish, Princess of Pain, lands upon the battlefield and gazes admiringly at the disintegrated corpse that lay in a twisted below. It is an impressive display from her would-be suitor, but does how will be fare compared to his team-mates? To what lengths will they go to compete for her affection?

    ***Princess Transformation Sequence***

    No stranger to the fire and frenzy of combat, the grey lady of clan WetwORCS initiates a subtle transformation wherein her muscular frame becomes more slender and her skin smoothes as it becomes more bark-like. Iron thews knot and bend oddly at the joints until Gaarish resembles a short, twisted willow tree. She flails her hair around in a rustling frenzy of reedy branches and hefts her warhammer with an eager anticipation of blood and gore to be spilt.

    Minor: Form of the Willow Sentinel!
    Move: Fly to H11
    Standard: Total Defense

    Form of the Willow Sentinel:
    "Effect: You assume the guardian form of the willow sentinel until the end of the encounter. While you are in this form, you can negate being pushed, pulled, or slid. In addition, any ally gains a +2 bonus to Fortitude while adjacent to you.
    "Special:Once during this encounter, you can use the Form of the Willow Sentinel Attack power while you are in this form.

    Gaarish will chose to negate forced movement unless I tell you otherwise.

    The attack power triggers if an enemy adjacent to Gaarish attacks one of my allies. Gaarish will use it at her first opportunity.

  6. Gaarish bends with the wind but does not break, her delicate appearance given over to that of a mysterious ninja. Did I just hear an Ocarina?

    Ugarth joins the party at location 1.

    Map and score updated.

  7. Ugarths rises like a mighty sunrise of death. "heh, break like wind. that pretty good, master of dungeons."

    He lifts his mighty axe, caked in the blood of gods and mortals alike and hefts it over his shoulder.

    He tastes the air and a wicked smile crosses his malicious face. "someone die. me can tell."

    He lofts himself into the air with a mighty surge of his powerful orcish legs and lands astride one of the mighty crates. He lifts his axe over his head and roars as a bloodied moon falls from the sky.


    Fly to G4 and total defense.

  8. Ugarth takes up a defensive position, just in time for the dreaded Rabbit of Caerbannog to arrive in location 1. Too bad holy hand grenades are consumables and outlawed in FTDM.

    Map and defenses updated

  9. The fearsome rabbit appears on the battlefield and squints his nose a couple of times. Spying a yummy looking orc ally by its loneseome it flies into action ready to get its first meal of the day.
    Start with at will stance aspect of soaring eagle active (speed +2)
    Move: Fly 6 to F8
    Minor: activate aspect of the charging ram stance
    Standard: Charge to G5 attacking Ugarths using heroic effort if necessary +11(+10 +1 for charging) for d8+d8(power strike on hit) +5 +2 (ram stance) +5 (death from above) and knock prone.
    On hit push towards I4 into blocking terrain and then use free action dual weapon attack using heroic effort if necessary and available +12 (+10+2CA prone) d6+5+5(death from above) on hit push towards H1

    1. The Rabbit Unleashed! With a mighty leap, he ravages the face of the unsuspecting Orc. First a minstrel, then a bunny?!

      Basic attack: 11+(3)+4 HE=18 vs AC 17 for (3)+(3)+5+2+5=18 damage. Ugarth is bloodied at 6hp and prone
      Dual Weapon Attack: (11)+12=23 vs AC 17 for 16 damage (Ghetto crit!), rendering Ugarth unconscious. He is then pushed off the edge with no save!


      The Rabbit lands in H5 and and Sir Lancelot appears in location 1.

      Map updated to follow later

  10. Note: As per the compendium entry, forced movement is "two-dimensional" (in this case horizontal) unless a target is already hovering. A target on the ground may not be forced into the air, unless it's over a precipice.

    1. what is the rule for acting/moving if you start your turn sharing a square with an enemy? Does being on top or on the bottom make a difference? How many characters can fit into the same square?

  11. Good questions. As per Occupied Square in the Compendium: "A prone creature that ends up in the same square as another creature has two main options for moving itself out of that square: crawl or stand up." So, you can stand and enter the an adjacent square as one move action.

    Top or bottom is irrelevant, and I'll say any number of characters can be in the same square. The issue will be legal squares to exit, as you cannot willfully enter an enemy's space.


  12. Launcelot appears before the invisible crowd and nods his head slightly to the open air.


    disembodied voice: "But I'm not dead yet!! I am going to respawn."


    He then proceeds to concentrate and become one with nature, hardening his skin and rooting himself to the ground when he touches it. He almoste resembles a tree.

    He leaps into the air and charges his fellow warden giving a quick death salute, his eyes in shock when he realizes he is flying. He races to finish off his opponent.

    As a minor action, He invokes the form of the Willow Sentinel(He assumes the guardian form of the willow sentinel until the end of the encounter. While he is in this form, he can negate being pulled, pushed, or slid. In addition, any ally gains a +2 power bonus to Fortitude while adjacent to you.)

    As a minor he will Hunter's Quarry Gaarish (+1d6 extra damage on a hit)

    Sir Lancelot charges down to G11 and attacks Gaarish with his Warden's Lunge +7 to attack (+6 base and +1 to charge) if hit 2d6+6+1d6 points of damage(reroll all 1's until they come up as something different).

    Sir Lancelot then marks the Assassin as a free action with Nature's Wrath(-2 to attack rolls if the marked tagets do not include him in their attacks.)

    Sir Lancelot then bravely hits Gaarish again with precise assault, Spending his Action Point. Since he has to move before the attack, he will fly strait up without provoking from the first square he moves away from and roundaboutly moves to square G12. +6 to attack, 4d6+6 points of damage.(rerolling 1's until they show something else)

    Minor: Form of the Willow Sentinel
    Minor: Hunter's Quarry Gaarish
    Standard: Chage Gaarish using Warden's Lunge +7 attack(+6, +1 charge) 2d6+6+1d6(if hits) with Mordenkrag
    Free Action: Mark Teddy-Sin
    Action Point: Precise Assault on Gaarish +6 attack, 4d6+6 damage

    I think I got everything.

  13. Replies
    1. The mighty Lancelot, seducer of Guinevere and paragon of virility falls on his willowy twin.

      Warden's Lunge: 7+(15)=22 vs AC 18 for (6)+(4)+6+(6)+5 (Death from Above)=27 points of damage. Gaarish is at 6 hp.

      Precise Assault: 8 (PA is STR +2 vs AC, not that it matters)+(19)=27 vs AC 18 for (1 rerolled to 2)+(1 rerolled to 2)+(5)+(5)+6+5 (DFA)=25 damage. Gaarish is unconscious at -14, and is knocked clean off the ledge to square L6, taking 11 falling damage for the gib! (unless Marc would rather push him there and leave him dying for some reason.

      Lancelot then falls out of the sky like a sword encased in stone, landing on Teddy-Sin and knocking both of them prone.

      Brave Sir Robin facing the first real test of his mettle, and spawns in location 2.

      Scores, conditions and map updated

    2. Half-Orc Resilience kicks in after the first attack for 5 temp HP.

      Form of the Willow Sentinel doesn't require an action (or even consciousness as far as I can tell) to negate forced movement. I should be at -9, prone at H11, and still providing Teddy with +2 Fortitude.

    3. RAW it doesn't, though the word negate tends to imply a "conscious" choice.

      Gaarish is at -9 in square H11. Map updates will come in the a.m.

  14. Fluff:
    Sir Robin, in an uncharacteristic act of bravery, went looking for his minstrel (hey someone needs to make Robin look good). Of course seeing the minstrel dead, two dead monsters, Lancelot struggling with a third, and a cute bunny rabbit Robin decides that this may not where he wants to be.

    “Lancelot, look out,” Robin yelps as Teddy-Sin wildly swings his sword. But when Teddy hits himself Robin says, “Oh, looks like you have this well in hand; I’ll just RUN AWAY! RUN AWAY!”

    Move: Fly to F10

    Standard: Charm of Misplaced Wrath on Teddy-Sin. +6 vs. Will. On a hit, I slide him to H13 then H14 (which he will make the save, but hey why not) and he is dazed until the end of my next turn. Effect, Teddy-Sin attacks himself with a MBA and takes an additional +2 damage if he hits.

    Minor: RUN AWAY! RUN AWAY! (Void Assumption – Robin ceases to exist until the start of his next turn at which point he reappears anywhere within 3 spaces of F10. So while you all fight, Robin is off drinking beer with the Eh Team is a cold, dark void.)

    1. True to his nature if not his name, Sir Robin runs away accompanied by a cacophony of coconuts clacking together.

      His cowardice displeases the Master Hand though, and he falls prone in his shame.

      Charm: 6+(1)=FAILURE (OOC: Kurt, if that's not karma I don't know what is...). Sir Robin falls to the ground in L10, taking (9)+(1)+(8)=18 falling damage, leaving him at 6 hp. His bloodied form then winks away to the great Canadian Pub in between dimensions, but not before he commands Teddy-Sin to have at himself.

      Effect, MBA: 8+(6)-5(squeezing)+2(CA)-2 prone=9 vs AC 18. Teddy-Sin's conscience tells him to stop touching himself, as the blow glances off his leather armour.

      The score is still tied at 1 as Urk appears in the popular location 2. I'll update the map in the morning to include the dying form of Gaarish.

    2. "Karma, thou art a bitch!" Robin screams as he runs out of the pub ahead of the Deadite of Humiliation.

      OOC: Could Robin roll athletics to decrease the damage (trained and have a +5 in it).

    3. If you mean Acrobatics, then yes. He reduces the damage by 9 points.

    4. Scratch that. Undeniable Gravity means no DR on falling.

    5. This comment has been removed by the author.

    6. Alright, I've re-read my own rules (sigh...) and yes the damage would reduced. The line says that the falling cannot be reduced or negated, not the damage.

      Robin is at 17 hp and not bloodied.

    7. Also, there are some obscure rules about mitigate falling damage while flying. For simplicity's sake, I'm going to say that those are invalid here, and stick to the normal d10 damage per 10 feet of falling, excepting acrobatics.

  15. Lancelot's HP updated. I've ruled that he'll still be prone when he returns, applying the rules for teleportation (closest thing to Void Assumption I could find).

  16. With an unsettling cry the half-orc Urk appears on the battlefield. With an uneasy jitter in his flight he bounces off the platform and, while floating in mid air, recites the most disturbing sermon any one has ever heard. Then, without missing a beat, he bounces back on the topmost platform and crawls behind a crate.

    Move: Fly to F10

    Free: Assassin's Shroud on Rabbit.

    Minor: Maledictor's Doom on Rabbit (Close Blast 5) ... No attack roll necessary.
    Effect: Rabbit takes a -1 penalty to attack rolls and saving throws until EONT.
    Until EONT, if hit him with any fear attack I can push him 1 square as a free action.

    ACTION POINT: Whispers of Defeat against Rabbit and Lancelot (Close Burst 5)
    +4 vs Will on Rabbit, +6 vs Will on Lancelot (w/ CA)
    Effect: Both take an additional -2 penalty to attack rolls (it stacks with above) until EONT, and if they miss with any attack they take 9 psychic damage.

    I will invoke the shroud on Rabbit for 1d6 damage. And if I hit Rabbit or Lancelot (in that order) I will also use Furious Assault for 1d8 more damage.

    I also push Rabbit 1 square West if I hit (Maledictor's Doom, fear attack).

    Standard (Move): Fly to D8

  17. Urk hovers around the field attempting to strike terror into the remaining Knights of Spamalot.

    Whispers of Defeat:
    vs Rabbit: 4+(2)=6 vs Will 12 is a miss (roll a two, drink the hooch). The effect of that power requires a hit so Rabbit is unaffected and the shroud disappears harmlessly.

    vs Lancelot: 4+2+(13)=19 vs Will 11 is a hit! Lancelot takes 2 damage from furious assault, and is at 26 hp.

    So ends round 1 of a close match--a little too close perhaps. I'll update the map and post round 2 shortly.

    1. Round 2 is posted here:


    2. For future reference, prone only grants +2 to attacks from melee attacks.

      Regardless it still hits.

    3. Squeezing also grants combat advantage.