Play by Post FTDM 12 - Army of Darkness - SUDDEN DEATH

The deadites close in chanting “Kill!, Kill!, Kill!, Kill!” Blood has been shed but dawn is fast approaching. It is still anyone’s game. The first gib will determine victory.

The new initiative is:
Igor: 22
Wil Wheaton: 19
Home Depot: 16
Walmart: 15
Lowe’s: 10
Comic Book Guy: 7
K-Mart: 6
Scott Pilgrim: 2

Corporate Raiders Win!


  1. OOC: We will keep the initiative as is.

    Igor drips with sweat and blood as the rotted deadites grasp at him all around the Oldsmobile. He pumps the boomstick again and cries "THE DAY MUST BE WON!" Then he fires an echoing bullet at Kmart.

    +8 (+2 from CA for a total of +10) vs. AC for 3d6+6 damage on hit.

    OOC: What a finale!

  2. We will see it the boomstick's aim it true.

    Attack: (4)+8+10=14 vs. 17. Damn a miss.

    Wil can you bring the match to a close?

    1. That addition is wrong, it should be (4)+8+2=14, oops.

  3. "It has all led to this."

    Wil's eyes go brilliant white and his scruffy beard glows with the burning light of Melora. Eldritch runes etch in a magical circle all about him and the whispers of eldritch horrors resound in the air all about the battelfield.

    Hovering in the air, The Wheaton floats towards to trembling K-mart and reaches a hand out towards the visibly shaken store employee.

    "It's okay. It will all be over soon."

    Lightning flashes and things fade to black.


    move action: shift to J7

    minor action: "Wil" of the Living for 1 radiant damage to Walmart and K-mart

    standard action: MELEE BASIC ATTACK +12 vs. AC (+2 for prone and still bladesonging it up), 1d8 + 12 damage and trigger Unseen Hand on K-mart for 3 force damage and shove into the Deadite in J5.


  4. May the dice be with you.

    (2)+8+2+2=14 vs. 17. Damn, roll a 2 drink the hooch.

    Oh man this is intense (and the dice aren't being nice).

    Home Depot now gets another shot at ending it.

  5. Let's bring it Home (Depot).

    Minor: WotL
    Standard: Slumbering Hurt vs Scott (+5 vs fort), 2d8 + 6 + 6 (flurry)

    Here's hoping.

  6. Will of the living drops Scott to 5. Attack (8)+5=13 vs. 17... No dice. It now goes to Walmart.

  7. Replies
    1. Heh, yeah, "sudden death"...

      *clatter* (4)
      *clatter* (2)
      *clatter* (8) (but still not enough)

      This just means we need to have Kurt DM a normal game so we can walk all over his dice.

  8. "Good morning Walmart shoppers!"

    NO fluff/ Let's get this over with. Kurt, I hope your dice got a nice eight hours of sleep in, its time to roll!

    Shift to J8.
    Std Action to attack Scott Pilgrim with Deft Strike, +8 vs AC, 1d6+5 damage.
    Minor action to grab the vest if it doesn't provoke OAs.

  9. Yes, yes to all my dice rolls suck... they tend to do the same in live games.

    Attack (7)+8=15 vs. 22... and my dice still suck.

    Walmart now has the Kevlar vest, which they are now doing rigorous testing on before they start selling it.

    Lowe's respawns at location 4.

  10. Quick post from work while I have internet...

    Standard: Thunder of Judgment on Scott, CBG, and Igor
    +6 vs Fortitude
    1d6+7 thunder damage, dazed until end of my next turn and pushed 3
    Scott to H6, CBG to E4, and Igor to H14

    Minor: Healing Word on KMart
    Healing Surge +1d6 and +2 to attack, and Will of the Living

    Minor again: Dwarven Resilience for defense boost

  11. From where you are standing Scott has cover.

    Scott: (18)+6-2=22 vs. 17, hit. Damage (6)+7=13, leaving Scott at -8. And the save is (10), Scott's prone in I7
    CBG: (8)+6=14 vs. 14 hit. Damage (3)+7=10, leaving CBG at 11. And the save is (11), so CBG is now prone.
    Igor: (4)+6=10 vs. 11 miss.

    K-Mart is healed 6+(1)=7 so he's now at 11, still bloody. Will of the living takes out the Deadites, takes Wil down to 16, and Scott down to -13... which is the negative bloody value... meaning Scott's gibbed.

    Sorry, no Dwarven Resilience for Lowe's.

  12. With Scott's gib, the Corporate Raiders have 12 deaths and the Army of Dorkness have 13. The Corporate Raiders win... the dorks were unable to take down the corporations, and now the world is overrun with Deadites and big box stores.

  13. Woot! I finally won a match!

    And those deadites will be working in our stores, can anyone say undying CHEAP LABOR?!?!?!?!!!

  14. Can't wait until the next board meeting of the corporate overlords, Walmart will host the first open bar!

    Well played all!

  15. What a nail biter!!! Down to the last kill.

    Good game everyone. A pleasure dealing death and ridiculousness with all of you.

  16. Until next time! Thanks for DMing Kurt. Good game everyone.

  17. Indeed, good game. I think we can all agree that Kurt's dice were the real enemy.

  18. That was awesome! The exhilaration of owning the first round, followed by that brilliant comeback in the sixth round, followed by the "Will the be the last roll?" edge-of-your-seat element of sudden death? Why I play FTDM.

    I'm anxious for the Blood, Sweat, and Tears on this one - Kurt's impressions, as well as the players', should be interesting.

  19. Will of the Living being the killing blow...there's a joke in that, right?

    Wow, was not expecting that to be how this ended, but I'll take it! Amazing game DM and players