FTDM 12 - Army of Darkness - Round 3


As the war between the Dorks and the Corps rage on, the Deadites advance. The spaces for the living are becoming scarce. The Deadites look to eat everyone's soul, except Lowe's (where they're planning to have a flash mob to dance Thriller).

Comic Book Guy falls from his wounds and reappears in location 4 and moves to painfully explain the corporation's negative qualities, killing 2 along the way.
Lowe's respawns at location 2, and launches a leaflet campaign leaving Wil and Scott thrown with many severe paper cuts.
Scott Pilgrim gets eaten by a Deadite, but gets his revenge by telefragging one of them.He runs to the store and lights them up a little.
Wil Wheaton starts his turn dazed and confused by ready to fight; he drops 2 stores and almost ties the score.
K-Mart reappears at location 4 on a mission to keep the score in the corporation's favor does some attacks making Igor spew hit points for his opponents.
Walmart reopens at location 2 slashing prices and dorks.
 Igor grabs the chainsaw so others can't have it and then shoots up the K-Mart.
Home Depot respawns at location 1 and he finished the round on another killing spree taking down Comic Book Guy and Wil Wheaton, and almost taking out Scott Pilgrim.


  1. Whoah. Can Home Depot still post a move action and action point?

  2. Yes he can up until CBG posts. (Though use the map from round 2 as there are not near as many Deadites.

  3. OK, then (using map 2) -

    Move action: Slumbering hurt move to I4
    Action Point: Slumbering hurt attack vs. Wil (+5 vs Fort) for 2d8 + 6 + 6 (flurry)

    1. I think there's a mistype there, it that I8?

  4. To keep the game moving, I'm moving Home Depot to I8. (You have until CBG goes to correct me).

    Attack against Wil (3)+5=8 vs. 12 (+2 due to bladesong). Miss. No Hail to the King, Baby.

    Comic Book Guy, it's your turn.

  5. "Ooh look at Mr. Fancy Big Box and his hard-hitting sales... How droll. My customers come for the items, but stay for the witty banter; something you'll never replicate."


    Move: to G8

    Minor: Healing Word on Scott Pilgrim (+Will of the Living, trained in religion).
    Effect: Surge +d6+4

    Standard: Astral Terror (burst 3, enemies; should hit all of them, though K-Mart has deadite cover).
    +5 vs will, use MoTL if necessary (as per the order in the next line).
    Hit: d6+4 psychic damage, and push Lowe's to G3, Walmart to B5, Home Depot to J10 (no legal push on K-Mart).

    I may AP depending on what happens.

    1. *might have deadite cover.

    2. "Soft" cover only applies to ranged attacks not area, close, or melee attacks. Will resolve the move in a little bit.

  6. Comic Book Guy heals Scott Pilgrim and burns the Deadites around Scott. Scott is now at 6+(4)+4= 14 hp (he's not even bloody).

    Then there is the witty banter attack on the big box stores:
    Lowe's (18)+5=23 vs. 17 hit!
    Walmart (10)+5=15 vs. 12 hit!
    Home Depot (7)+5=12 vs. 12 hit!
    K-Mart (1)+5 vs. 15 Humiliation! (and MoTL won't save that)
    And for the 8 other enemies in the burst, well they all have a will of 6 so you hit them, all that matters now is if you are humiliated or groovy by any rolls: 3, 8, 4, 13, 9, 14, 11, and 19 (no such luck).
    Lowe's, Walmart, and Home Depot all take (6)+4=10 damage so Lowe's is at 7 hp, Walmart is at -9 and Home Depot is at 12.
    The Deadites all take 10 - 10 = 0 damage (due to DR).
    Lowe's is Groovy! so doesn't mind hanging with the Deadites. Walmart's save is a (2) so he's hanging with the Deadites (and they look hungry). Home Depot is at J9 as J10 is not legal (still 3 squares away).

    We need a humiliation Deadite and a possible AP. Also, the page where I was recording conditions got corrupted and I will have to work on fixing that this evening, so conditions may vary from what's up top... sorry.

    1. I will AP pending deadite placement, and I'll also use my Manifestation of Malediction to push Walmart one more, to A4.

    2. By my reading of cover, I'm ruling that standing in a square with a Deadite provides cover against ranged attacks.

      We need the Deadite of Humiliation placed (note to self, find an icon for Nelson Munce.)

    3. Oh right. Deadite. Jolly good. How is Kmart not dead yet?

      How's H-8 sound? I know Wil's all about the NOH8, but it sounded good.

    4. H8 is where the undead Nelson pops up saying "Ha, ha!" And as for can you use Manifestation of Malediction on Walmart, the answer is no... as he moved into B5, he took 5 points of necrotic damage, leaving him dead at -14 hp. Neconomicon is now in space B5. Will update with next map update.

    5. OOC: Can I push Lowe's to F2, then? If not, no worries.

      Action Point:

      Hand of Radiance vs K-Mart, Lowe's and Home Depot.
      +5 vs Reflex, using MoTL as per the order above if applicable.
      (Lowe's has cover, but is granting CA due to the altar. If the deadites in front of Lowe's double the cover, I'll attack them before Lowe's and decline the attack on Home Depot).
      Hit: d4+4 radiant damage.
      If Lowe's is hit, and the push to F2 is allowed, push him to E1 with the manifestation.

    6. You cannot push Lowe's to F2. The push is 3 squares total and dwarf reduces to 2.

      As for the next attack:
      K-Mart: (4)+5+(1, MoTL)=10 vs. 13, miss (K-Mart just won't be hit)
      Lowe's: (12)+5-2+2=17 vs. 15 hit. Damage (3)+4=7 leaving Lowe's at 0 hp.
      Home Depot: (12)+5=17 vs. 16 hit. Damage (3)+4=7 leaving Home Depot at 5 hp.
      Well that makes a killing spree.

      Lowe's self-gibs and respawns at 2.

  7. I figured out the problem and adjusted the character jpeg. Let me know if the font's too small.

  8. For the record, Home Depot should have 5 temp HP for getting bloodied by Hand of Radiance.

    And I double-checked - forgetting it last round just means I would have healed him from -4HP instead of -9HP, so no worries.

    1. The temp hit points only apply to last round. 1/2-orc resistance is not an encounter power and so does not refresh with a respawn.

    2. Yes, I agree with Kurt; we have traditionally ruled Half-Orc Resilience to be a once per match benefit.

  9. "Well, that was a major headache. Let's see now. To boost sells, we need to run a new advertising scheme. Fliers for everyone." Stacks of fliers get picked up in the wind and spread out over the field, blinding and suffocating nearby customers, driving them away.

    "Oh, uh, we sell first aid kits as well."

    Thunder of Judgment on Scott, Igor, and Wil
    +6 vs Fort
    1d6+7 thunder damage and dazed
    If hit, push Scott to F5, Igor to H14 (I don't think I can push him any further back), and Wil to E12 (curse you pushing rules)

    Healing Word on Home Depot
    HS +1d6

    If Scott was pushed, move to K8
    If Scott was not pushed, move to J5

  10. Ooh, death by 1,000 paper cuts.

    As the power is a ranged attack, Igor and Wil get cover (and I have to roll damage separately).
    Scott: (18)+6=24 vs. 15 hit. (4)+7 = 11 damage; Scott @ 3 hp + Dazed. Save (2), Scott is in F5 with the Deadite.
    Igor: (2)+6-2=6 vs. 11 miss.
    Wil: (8)+6-2=12 vs. 12 hit. (4)+7 = 11 damage; Wil @ 11 hp, bloody, dazed and in E12.

    Home Depot gains 5+(3)=8 hp and is now at 20 hp and gains a +2 to attacks until the end of Lowe's next turn.

    Scott get's his soul eaten and then respawns at location 3 (telefragging the deadite in the process).

  11. Scott finds himself back on the field, surrounded by deadites. "Um...I think you all need to back off. I'm in a committed relationship, and I don't think I'm in lesbians with any of you."

    Running past Wil Wheaton, Scot gives his buddy a high-five before stepping up next to Home Depot. "I AM SEX BOB-OMB! 1 2 3 YEAAAAHHHHHH!" and brings his axe down on the department store, only to have the reverb slam into K-Mark and Lowes.

    Move: to I8. E12->F11->G10->H9->I8
    Standard: Vengeance Strike vs. Home Depot: +6 vs. AC 1d10+4+8(Vengeance Strike) + 6 (Dread Smite) & ongoing 5
    Miss: 6 damage
    Minor: Dragon Breath on Lowes, Home Depot, & K-Mart, +6 vs Reflex (+7 vs Bloodied enemies), 1d6 radiant & fire damage

  12. Dragonborn is +1 while bloody, Teifling is +1 vs. bloody opponents.

    I'm so tempted to roll an attack roll to see if the high-five connects...

    Anyway, the attack on the Home Depot: (6)+6=12 vs. 17 miss. Home Depot takes 6 damage anyway and is now at 14 hp (not quite bloody).

    The Dragon's Breath:
    Lowe's (17)+6=23 vs. 13 hit
    K-Mart (10)+6=16 vs. 13 hit
    Home Depot (12)+6=18 vs. 16 hit
    They all take (2) points of damage Lowe's is at 26, K-Mart still holding on at 1, and Home Depot at 12.

    Wil starts his turn Dazed and confused.

    1. All the screens in the home theater department of Kmart light up at once. On each one is a different girl - Ramona, Knives, Kim, Natalie, etc. They all scream at once, apparently directed at Scott.

      "One hit point? One hit point!? You can't even take out a poorly performing discount store?"

    2. I want you to take your dice, freeze them, then shatter them with a hammer.

  13. Wil shakes his head, "Not cool, man. Not cool!" He turns and looks at the rotting hordes all around him. "Man, I really hate the undead." He turns toward the corporate giants across from him. His eyes turn to the sky and Wil whispers a simple prayer to the dice gods. "I will offer up the critical failure die of Jerry Holkins(!) himself to you if this plan works." He finishes with an ever charming wink at the sky/DM.

    With that, Wil lifts his sword high over his head and roars like a tusken raider as he goes running towards Home Depot.


    standard action: (stupid dazed) charge to I9 and Melee Basic Attack, +11 vs. AC, 1d8+12 on a hit and trigger Unseen Hand (no action) to deal 3 force damage to K-mart and slide him to square K4.

    If I trigger the Killing Spree, I would like to use my action point to repeat my Melee Basic Attack (+10 vs. AC, 1d8+12 on a hit) against Home Depot (provided he is not gibbed by first attack, which I don't think is mathematically possible. On a hit I'd like to use Unseen Hand on Lowe's for 3 force damage and slide him into the deadite at I7.

  14. The sky opens up and a hand appears giving Wil a big thumbs up.

    Attack: (17)+11=28 vs. 17 a marginal hit at best :). Damage (3)+12=15 leaving the Home Depot at -3 hp. K-Mart then takes 3 damage finally dropping to -2 and gets thrown into respawn 2.

    Action point: (5)+10+2(CA)=17 vs. 17-5(unconscious) hit. Damage (5)+12=17 leaving a red mist where Home Depot was (-20 hp). Lowe's takes 3 damage, taking him to 23. The DM gets the last laugh though the save is a (10) so Lowe's is merely prone in J8.

    With that K-Mart self-gibs and respawns at 4.

    1. Oh, Lowe's is a Dwarf. He was slid only 2 of the 3 spaces he could have been slid so the position is correct. But he does get a save vs. falling prone and he gets a (12). Lowe's is NOT prone.

  15. What's this? Kmart's got an "Under Construction - Grand Reopening" sign? The din and craziness of all the construction is distracting and horrifying to the Dorks at large. So much so, that when the tape is cut and the signs are lit, Igor finds himself turned into a Hit Point Piñata and Wil stumbles towards a Deadite!

    Welcome! Welcome to the new BIG Kmart!

    "BIG Kmart", AKA Potent Rebirth adds +2 to my attack and damage rolls until the end of the encounter.
    Move: walk to H-11
    Standard: Staggering Note against Wil Wheaton
       Attack: +6 vs Wil's Will 11 (13 - dazed)
       Hit: 4 thunder damage, push to H-8. Lowe's takes an MBA before the push. (+3, 1d8 damage)
    Action Point: Stirring Shout against Igor
       Attack: +6 vs Will 12
       Hit: 2d6 + 6 psychic damage
       Effect: Until the end of the encounter, my allies regain 4 HP whenever they hit Igor.
    Kmart will be using Memory of a Thousand Lifetimes on a non-humiliating missed attack.

  16. OOC: minor technical note: Dazed gives a bonus to attack not a penalty to defense (of course for all practical purposes it's the same thing).

    Big K comes back hoping to make Wil run and Igor buy stuff:
    Attack on Wil: (2)+6+2(CA)+(5 MoTL)=13 vs. 13 hit. Wil takes 4 damage and is at 7 hp. Lowe's attacks (2)+3+2(CA)=7 vs. 19 miss. Wil is pushed and his save (16), Wil is prone where he stands (so to speak).

    Attack on Igor: (17)+6=23 vs. 12 hit... Oh, but what of the Second Chance? (17)+6-5=18 vs. 12 still a hit. (2)+(2)+6=10 hp leaving Igor at 14 and making him a hit point pinata.

    My dice seem to like low damage rolls. I need to teach them a lesson.

    Walmart reopens at location 2.


    Attention all deadite shoppers, We're slashing prices in the toy and electrics departments this weekend! Any item sprayed with the blood of wheaton is is %60 off, and in-store flyer coupons will slash prices further on doritos, slushee mix, radioactive man comics, and the full El-Barto line of Simpsons memorabilia!

    Move to G7 via J4 on a diagonal, shouldn't provoke any OAs.
    Minor action to use improved razor storm, CB2, targeting CBG, Scott, and Wheaton (gain CA b/c he is dazed) plus two deadites. +7(+9 vs wheaton!) vs Reflex, 1d8+5 and 5 ongoing on a hit.
    Standard action: Precise Incision vs CBG: +8 vs Reflex 11, 3d6+5 damage on a hit. Its a reliable power (if I miss, I retain its use). Man, do I wish I had CA.

    If I gain the killing spree, I'll bank the new AP for now.

  18. Attention Walmart shoppers, we currently are having a sale on PAIN!

    Okay the razor storm:
    CBG: (18)+7=25 vs. 11 hit
    Scott: (8)+7=15 vs. 14 hit
    Wil: (3)+7+2=12 vs. 15 miss
    Deadite in I7: (11)+7=18 vs. 6 hit
    Deadite in H8: (7)+7=14 vs. 6 hit
    Everyone but Wil take (2)+5=7 damage leaving CBG at 20, Scott at 19, and the Deadites with the DR 10 are just pissed off ("Where are the bloody 60% of items!?!?")

    Precise Incision: (18)+8=26 vs. 11... I'd call that a hit. Damage (5)+(6)+(2)+5=18 leaving Comic Book Guy bloody but still alive at 2 hp.

    Igor, with your shotgun in hand, take your turn.

  19. Igor raises one eyebrow, reaches down and throws the chainsaw over his back while shouting, "YOU CAN'T HAVE IT!". Then he pumps the shotgun, and blasts shells through KMart's newly stocked plasma screen TVs.

    Minor to pick up chainsaw just so you can't have it.
    Minor assume Duelist's Prowess stance and I will immediately interrupt anyone adjacent to me attacking me with a quick +8 to hit 1d8+5 damage (+2d6 as long as I'm on top of this oldsmobile)
    Standard to slugshot this boomstick right at Kmart's newest goods. +10 vs AC, 3d6+6 damage on hit.


  20. Igor can't reassume Duelist's Prowess as it's a daily power. Sorry about that. You will still have a move action to use if you want.

    Igor pops the trunk and grabs the chainsaw. Then he goes postal on the K-Mart. Attack: (13)+8+2(CA)=23 hit. Damage: (4)+(3)+(4)+6=17. K-Mart falls to 9 hp, is bloodied and prone.

    I'm going to wait to see if Igor wants to move before determining where Home Depot starts. Map to update before tomorrow morning.

    1. Whoops, sorry about that! No, I'm pretty comfy here. Go ahead and spawn Home Depot.

  21. Home Depot has a grand re-opening at location 1.

    1. "Friggin' customers - you redesign the store and they can't even stand in line without being confused..."

      Move: Slumbering Hurt move to H9 (avoids OAs)
      Standard: Slumbering Hurt vs. Wil (+5 vs Fort, plus whatever it is for Wil being dazed and prone), 2d8 + 5 damage. If I hit, Flurry on CBG (8 damage)
      Action Point: Crashing Wave vs. Scott (+5 vs Fort), 1d8 +5 + 1d* (furious assault), and push him into the Deadite at I7.

    2. That should be 1d8 on Furious Assault...damn shift key.

    3. And... Kmart imposes an audit on Home Depot's books. His Implement Focus (Club) gives an extra 1 damage. Hail to the King, Baby.

  22. Well let's see those attacks...
    On Wil: (11)+5+2(CA)=18 vs. 10 hit. Damage: (3)+(2)+5=10 (dice you DO want to avoid being frozen then hit, right). Wil is now at -3 hp. And the Flurry of Blows leaves Comic Book Guy at -6 hp... Home Depot is on another killing spree.
    On Scott: (12)+5=17 vs. 15 hit. Damage: (7)+(6)+5=18 leaving Scott with a single hit point (no hail to the king, but hey how many times to you see a character get a killing spree two rounds in a row). Scott's save on going into the Deadites is a (12); Scott is now prone in his square.

    Thus ends round 3. Round 4 will be posted soon.

    1. Okay, well it appears that everyone just took one more point of damage, so CBG is at -7, Wil's at -4 and Scott's at 0... Hail to the King, Baby. Home Depot gets all hp, healing surges, and encounter powers back.

  23. Round 4 is posted here: