Play-by-Post: Match 01, Round 04

Playoffs! 09 === wetwORCs 11 === QuadCore 10
Sarah Connor - Renato Ugarth Dav'd - T.Grumpkin - Og - P3-10R - Morthos C.T.Feltek - Odesso Alecto Kludge - Dungeon Master
Sarah Connor - Renato Ugarth Dav'd - T.Grumpkin - Og - P3-10R - Morthos C.T.Feltek - Odesso Alecto Kludge - Dungeon Master
Round 4 - FIGHT!
Sarah Connor prepares to answer the question of just how many bones there are in the human body.
P3-10R is dropped. She springs to action, pounding away at the Terror Machines of Skynet, dropping P3-10R and gibbing Og. Oh, poor Og, you get beat up so.
Renato self-GIBBED!
Renato respawn at Location 3. He shimmies closer to the protective embrace of Sarah Connor and takes after her lead, dropping Kludge with a well-placed catapult. Only fitting, as Kludge was about to take his 3rd turn without dying, and thus claiming the longest streak of being alive. Can't have that, now can we!
Ugarth respawn at Location 1, and dances around to ...
Ugarth then smashes his axe through CT Feltek's steel armor, opening him up like a tin can. Feltek is dropped!
Miraculously, Dav'd survives the burns from the boiling lake of blood. Though bloodied, he hangs on for another round of killing. He brilliantly goes for the tempest weapon in the Armory of Last Resort, and completely splatters Kludge!
Kludge is GIBBED!
T.Grumpkin self-GIBBED!
Just when you thought you had this thing figured out, a wrench gets thrown into the works and team wetwORCs slides down to last place!
Teddy Grumpkin Respawn at 4 and takes advantage of team Playoffs! clumping together by hurling a catapult shot over to them, but cannot cut through Sarah Connor's ridiculous defenses.

Og Respawn at 1, and is thwarted by both bad rolls and end of turn resistances.
P3-10R self-GIBBED!
P3-10R Respawn at Location (4). He teleports through the voids and blasts Renato with tons o' radiant vulnerability, trying to key off a teamplay combo. Let's see if QuadCore can pull it off! Meanwhile, at the Legion of Doom,
Morthos manipulates the fabric of space and time, sending Og through the Dark Portal and into the rumble down under.
CT Feltek plays possum at the feet of gore-splattered Ugarth.
Odesso returns from The Beyond, Respawning at Location 4 and tries for a daring move,leaping over the boiling lake, infused with divine might, tumbles into the dirt, and yanks out the wand of fireballs, raining hell upon his enemies! EPIC!
Alecto self-GIBBED!
Alecto Respawn at Location 1, deftly moves through Og ...
and casts his spells about.
Kludge, for the win, Respawns at Location 4. Get yer boys outta last place! Kludge unleashes a hail of death, as the alluring greed of the Armory of Last Resort drags the dungeoneers unerringly towards the heart of the citadel.
Renato is GIBBED!

We may have thought that this match was in the bag, but FTDM throws another wild card and places victory within the grasp of all!


  1. Dav'd should have also been attacked by the alluring greed at the end of round 3: CRITICAL HIT! He will be slid to H8.

  2. Sarah Connor wipes the sweat from her brow and eyes her weak enemies across the way and hauls back on the catapult launching a huge rock between the robot and the green guy!

    Tech: Standard Catapult to C5

    If they're both still conscious, hit 'em again with an action point. If at least one drops then I'll save it.

    Sarah Connor doesn't need her minor or move, would anyone else like them?

  3. (17)+8= 25 vs. P3-10R's AC 19; Hit !
    (7)+8= 15 vs. Og's AC 14; Hit!

    Both take (1)+(3)+9= 13 damage!
    5 resisted by P3



    Renato self-gibs to Respawn at location (3).
    Map updated in the morning.

  4. Can I take my killing spree? If so:

    Sarah smirks at the death of the 'mighty robot' and reloads the catapult, sending a shot into the boiling blood to strike Dav'd.

    Tech: Standard - Catapult to H8.

  5. BTW, Og deals 10 thunder damage to you via Stormhawl's Vengeance.

    That would indeed trigger Killing Spree and you can use your extra Action Point gained from Killing Spree to make another attack. Try to put in conditional attacks, when you can, if you think you've got a shot at getting 2 kills.

    (5)+8= 13 vs. Dav'd's AC 15; Miss!

    I know Hap (Renato) is having computer hardware troubles. Get in touch with him and post for him if need be.

  6. via email (due to computer troubles):

    Renato moves to R20 and chucks a bag o rocks on top of Kludge, Heroic Effort if need be .

    (9)+8+2 [combat advantage from Darkfire] = 19 vs. Kludge's AC 18; Hit! a decisive hit to the jugular!
    for (3)+(2)+9= 14 damage! Kludge is dropped unconscious in a torrent of blood! Wand of Fireballs ain't doin' ya so good now, eh!

    Ugarth Respawns at Location 1, raring to go!

    Map updates in the morning.

  7. Ugarth materializes on the shimmering teleportation pad and cries out, "NOOOOOOOOOOOOO! TEDDDDDDDDYYYYYY! Ugarth SORRRRRY!" His guttural shout resonating in the air, he turns and sees his hated enemy Morthos. He shudders and starts to walk towards him, but then he turns his head to the right and sees another warrior standing on the telepad. "Hehehe." Ugarth chortles with wicked glee. He turns back and jumps straight into the teleporter materializing inside of Odesso bits of gore spattering the floor around him. The now blood soaked orc holds his ax high, grinds his feet into the floor and charges toward the well armored CT, his battle cry streaming behind him.

    Move action: D4 to F4, then back to D4, teleporting to D17 for the telefrag.
    Minor Action: Berserker's Charge, +2 to speed and attack rolls when charging.
    Standard Action: CHARGE to square C19 and melee basic against CT. +11 vs AC, 1d12 (brutal 2) + 8 damage,

    If Attack Hits trigger Power Strike, + 1d12 (brutal 2) damage, and Takedown Strike +5 damage and knocked prone.
    If enemy doesn't fall from all that, also trigger Furious Assault for +1d12 (brutal 2). damage.

  8. Firstly, there was a math error; Kludge is still alive, but bloodied.

    (15)+11= 26 vs. C.T.Feltek's AC 23; Hit!
    for (3)+8+(2)+5= 18 damage, and knocked prone!
    Ugarth is then forced to use furious assault for an additional (10) damage [28 total], dropping Clarence Terrence Feltek.

    Dav'd is up and about, being burned alive, but surviving to take his turn!

  9. Master Dav’d whirs into focus amid the pixilated lake of flaming blood. “You've enjoyed all the power you've been given, haven't you KLUDGE?” he sarcastically snarls as he moves toward his nemesis. Near the TREASURE PILE he notices a brutal and needlessly sadistic weapon. End of line!

    0. Take 10 DAMAGE [15 – 5 resist all]

    1. Minor
    Oath of Enmity on KLUDGE

    2. Move

    3. Free
    Armory of Last Resort
    +2 Grand Tempest Full blade

    4. Standard
    Avenging Echo vs KLUDGE
    +13 vs. 18 AC -- Two Rolls!
    (+7 normal, +2 Combat Advantage, +2 healing word, +2 Weapon]
    (+5 normal, +5 Radiant Vulnerability, +2 Weapon

  10. EPIC! This should be good!

    (11) or (18)+13= 31 vs. Kludge's AC 18; Hit!
    for (11)+12= 23 damage! Kludge is GIBBED ON THE SPOT!

    Teddy Grumpkin is up, respawning at Location (4)

  11. Teddy, momentarily stunned with a huge headache, reappears, marches over to Ugarth, slaps him on the side of the head: "Stupid! NO LISTEN TO METAL MANS!". He cuts the line on the catapult, sending it towards the humans hiding in the other corner, bellowing "Package delivery for Mrs Connor!"

    Move to B18,
    free action to slap Ugarth,
    Standard action to fire Catapult (target sq 19)
    +8 vs AC, burst 1, 2d6+9

  12. (Dav'd's HP updated, he is not bloodied after all.)

    (4)+8= 12 vs. Renato's AC 18; Miss!
    (15)+8= 23 vs. Sarah Connor's effective AC 24; Miss!

    No damage, incredible!

    Og respawns at Location (1).

  13. Og looks over at his nemesis and compels him to take a flying leap in to the lava, then fires another bolt of energy towards the center of the field.

    Standard: Hypnotism vs Morthos (+4 vs Will) ... Slide him off the ledge and in to the lava all the way to L8.

    Minor: Wizard's Fury Magic Missile at Dav'd, automatic 6 damage.

    Move: If I hit Morthos with the attack, move to J3. If not, move to A3.

  14. Yes! I like the speed of posting. I guess having back-to-back teammates makes things go quick.

    Right, Renato? ;)

    (2)+4= 6 vs. Morthos' Will 12; Miss!
    Roll a 2, drink the hooch!

    Dav'd, still resist 5 all, take a net of 1 damage.

    P3-10R self-gibbed and respawn at Location (4).

  15. P3-10R whirls into existence (again) within spitting distance of the Orcs. After renewing the red force fields around Dav'd, Morthos, and himself, he assesses the Doomsday timer and death sensors - recalibrating for different targets P3 whisks off to the other side of the map.

    Stepping in close to the squirrelly monk, P3 opens his radiation ports and activates his torso piston, sending radioactive hot metal squarely towards Renato!

    -- Minor --
    Sustain Moment of Glory (resist 5 all UENT for P3-10R, Dav'd, & Morthos)

    -- Move --
    Off and on 'port to 3, then to R-19

    -- Minor --
    Solar Enemy (Sarah & Renato gain vulnerable 5 radiant UENT)

    -- Action Point -- (regained from DM using the "Read the right map, dumbass" power)
    Blessing of Light against Renato
    Attack: +7 vs AC
    Hit: 1d8 + 6 radiant damage (+5 vuln, +11 total)
    Effect: The next time Renato hits me or any of my allies UENT, he takes 2 radiant damage (+5 vuln, 7 total)

  16. (2)+7= 9 vs. Renato's AC 18; Miss!

    Swing low, sweet chariot...

  17. That's ok - his sunburn's still gonna bother him if he tries to hit back. And seriously, another (2)?

  18. Morthos slowly rights himself, and scans the battlefield. Cursing that so many of the fleshy ones are out of range, he turns his attention to the orc mage. "YOU call that A SPELL?! YOU are a DISGRACE to the PROFESSION and must be EXTERMINATED!"

    Rather than risk the foolish ork grabbing onto the ledge, Morthos sends out a ray of light and simply pulls Og onto the telepad. Might as well let someone else have the rather squishy experience of killing the fool mage.

    Morthos turns his attention to the Humans in the Southeast corner. "And what of the PUNY HUMANS? Do you FEAR ME, since you HIDE in the CORNER like COWARDS! DO you DREAD your INEVITABLE EXTERMINATION?"

    Move: Stand
    Standard: Hypnotism on Og. Slide to Telepad #1 and teleport to #3
    Minor: Taunt Team Playoff.


  19. Hook me up with yo stats!

    (12)+5= 17 vs. Og's Will of 12; Hit!

    Og is sent through the Dark Portal to join the ruckus down under.

    by previous email, Feltek holds onto a little thing we call WINNING and takes a death save (19); Success! He plays possum in front of Ugarth.

    Odesso returns from the Netherworld at Location (4), surrounded by savage orcs.

  20. The bits and pieces of Odesso reform quickly, and his processor speeds through the startup protocol. His probability drive suggests that launching a large projectile in the SE corner will significantly increase his teams chance of survival. Odesso detects two orcs guarding and smelling up the nearest catapult, so launches himself towards the treasure pile and the wand of fireball, after reading the memo Dav'd left on his cloud drive seconds earlier.

    Jump from E16 down into the lake of blood, continue movement to I11 (move action). +5 for Acrobatics/Athletics check.
    Grab wand of fireball from pile (free action).
    Launch fireball at square R18 (standard).
    Recite the first 2000 decimal places of Pi while damage is calculated (free action).

  21. Oh, sorry, +10 to the athletics jump, I forgot Aspect of Might.

  22. Jumping down, Odesso is looking at (5)+(4)= 9 damage
    However, the droid is trained in Acrobatics, and negates (12)+5= 17/2= 8 damage
    Unfortunately, all the Athletics in the world doesn't help you much from that falling damage.

    Oh! Odesso takes 15 fire damage from willfully entering the lake of boiling blood, a measly 1 damage from the fall, but most importantly he is knocked prone!

    I assume he would then spend his standard action to crawl (at half speed)??? That's what I would do, anyway, considering your current HP total. Check my numbers, check your char sheet; make sure that's all square.

    Without further ado, Alecto jumps back into the fray at Location (1).

    *teleport sound*

  23. I believe the Athletics check was to jump forward, clearing as much of the blood as possible. If he gets 25+ he clears the entire thing, and if he gets 20+ he's still able to grab the wand fireball.

  24. @Jon: Thanks for the clarification! Trent and I were going back and forth via email and not quite seeing eye to eye as to what it is that he wanted to be doing here.

    So then my first roll would be for an Athletics check made to send Odesso sailing through the air on a direct course with The Armory of Last Resort. Assuming he backtracks a square to get a running start and taking Aspect of Might's bonus to speed into account for total number of squares able to be moved:
    (12)+10= 22; 22/5 (round down) = 4 cleared squares


    Placing Odesso squarely on the intended I11.

    He falls for 9 damage, knocked prone, but negates [(3)+5]/2= 4 damage; total of 5 falling damage taken.

    He then fireballs the crap outta you guys, taking a -2 penalty to attack rolls while prone:

    (14)+6-2= 18 vs. Og's Reflex of 14; Hit!
    (19)+6-2= 23 vs. P3's Reflex of 11; Hit!
    (9)+6-2= 13 vs. Sarah's Reflex of 15; Miss!
    Per email; Memory of 1000 Lifetimes to add (4); HIT!
    (18)+6-2= 22 vs. Renato's Reflex of 16; Hit!

    Damage rolled is (3)+(6)+(2)+(2)+2= 15 fire damage, excepting P3's resist 5 all, of course


    Alecto is still up at Location 1.


  25. Alecto reappears back into the bad dream of this crazy arena and eyes Og standing on the teleporter across the arena. Time for a pink Orc explosion.

    move action: step to C3 then back on the teleporter, teleport to Q17 and telefrag Og then continue moving to R13.
    standard: hypnotism +5 vs. will on P3-10R moving him to the teleporter at Q17.
    minor: magic missile Odesso

  26. Oh and 7 damage on the magic missile.

  27. Good thing you were checking, since after re-reading my previous post I realized that I can't count squares nor can I remember the word "of" between "wand" and "fireball." Feel free to ignore me from here on out.

  28. hypno: (12)+5= 17 vs. P3's Will 18; Miss!
    Odesso takes 7 damage, but is still kicking.

    Kludge, my boy, you are Respawning at Location (4). It's like a big green orc party over here!

  29. Does Stormhawk's Vengeance apply in the case of a telefrag?

  30. Telefragging isn't an attack, nor does it drop the target's actual hit points. Thus, telefraggin and other insta-kill effects (like the meat grinder in E1M1) do not trigger Stormhawk's Vengeance, Infernal Wrath, Killing Spree, etc.

  31. Kludge, apparently unaware of his transition, manifests in the SW corner of The Citadel while shredding on an air guitar and thrashing his head.

    "Destroy the mind, destroy the body, but you cannot destroy the heart..."

    The half-orc leaps into the air and lands on the tele-pad. He reappears in the SE and steps deftly to the south. Kludge swings his imaginary "axe", unleashing a wave of psionic energy upon the crowd!

    Move: Teleport to #3 and step to Q18.
    Standard: Steel Avalanche. Targets all creatures within close blast 3 (R18:R20-T18:T20); +4 vs Reflex; 3d8+4 dmg and -2 to attacks (save ends. On a miss, its half-damage and -2 on attack until the end of my next turn.
    If I Hit Any Target: Trigger Furious Assault to add and Steel Avalanche deals 4d8+4 damage instead (1/2 on a miss)
    If I Hit Any Target: Trigger Stone Fist flurry of blows against P3 (6 dmg)
    If I hit P3: Trigger Takedown Strike for an additional 4 dmg.
    After the Attack: Kludge shifts to Q20 per Steel Avalanche.
    Killing Spree: If P3 took 20+ damage, unleash the Five Storms. +4 vs Reflex; 1d8+4 dmg. Otherwise, I'll bank the AP for later.

  32. Addendum: Five Storms attacks all enemies within close burst 1. CT is still a valid target if I attack P3 for the killing spree. Kludge will gleefully kick CT while he is down to hasten his death.

  33. Impressive!

    (10)+4= 14 vs. Sarah's Reflex 15; Miss!
    (15)+4= 19 vs. P3-10R's Reflex 11; Hit!
    (13)+4= 17 vs. Renato's Reflex 16; Hit!
    Furious Assault thrown in for an extra d8 damage
    for (3)+(8)+(3)+(2)+4= 20 base damage!

    Stone Fist Flurry of Blows and Takedown Strike for an extra 10 damage against P3

    Sarah takes 10 damage and is dropped!

    P3-10R takes 25 net damage (after resist 5 all) and is dropped! KILLING SPREE!!!

    Renato takes 20 damage and is GIBBED!!!

    Kludge is nowhere near CT Feltek ... Dungeone Master decrees that you are banking the Action Point for future gibbing.

    Allure of Greed coming up!

  34. Og and Renato are in gib-land.
    Dav'd and Odesso are adjacent to the Armory of Last Resort.

    (9)+6= 15 vs. Sarah Connor; Will 15 [unconscious]; Hit! Slide to R17 (Teleport 4)

    (16)+6= 22 vs. Ugarth; Will 10; Hit! Slide to E17 (Teleport 3); Dungeon Master chooses to Force Teleportation to E5 (Teleport 1)

    (15)+6= 21 vs. T.Grumpkin; Will 13; Hit! Slide to E17 (Teleport 3)

    (5)+6= 11 vs. P3-10R; Will 13 [unconscious]; Miss!

    (6)+6= 12 vs. Morthos; Will 12; Hit! Slide negated due to blocking terrain.

    (5)+6= 11 vs. C.T.Feltek; Will 13 [unconscious]; Miss!

    (17)+6= 23 vs. Alecto; Will 14; Hit! Slide to P11
    Save vs. Falling (6); Fail!
    Alecto falls prone and takes (6)+(10)= 16 falling damage! Alecto is bloodied!

    (5)+6= 11 vs. Kludge; Will 13; Miss!


    The teams are neck and neck, worriedly looking towards a mid-match elimination after Round 6.

    The 48-hour rule will be suspended throughout the next week to cover the upcoming holiday. For you Canadians reading this, it's the *real* Thanksgiving.