Play-By-Post Match 19 | Round 03


  1. Team Sesame Street is falling behind in this high-concentration, low-scoring match!

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    Bryan asked us to take his turn if there was a chance of delay of game gib. If you don't hear from Bryan (which is currently unlikely before 3 am), go for this move.

    Move to F6 (5 squares) activating the telethrower and doing 5 damage to Asar-Segt and pushing him off the edge (hopefully). Then for the 6th square move to G13, hitting Lyth and doing 5 damage to her pushing her to I6.
    Standard -> Move move to M6 (2 squares). Hitting Lyth again for 5 and push to H6. Then with the remaining 4 square, walk back to H6 Telethrowering himself back into Lyth for a final 5 damage and pushing her into the telethrower and either other the edge (or a second shot at knocking Asar-Segt over the edge).

    Oh, crap and here's some fluff ideas...

    "Do you know what Elmo's thinking about. Elmo's thinking about Forced movement. Let's ask Mr. Asar-Segt about forced movement... no Mr. Asar-Segt don't go flying over the edge! Ha, ha, ha.

    "Elmo wants to know more about forced movement. Let's ask Mr. Drawer who takes forced movement. Does Lyth take force movement? Yes! Does Lyth take forced movement again? Yes! Does Lyth take forced movement a third time? Yes!

    "Elmo wants to sing the forced movement song:

    "Forced movement, forced movement, forced mo-ve-ment.* That's Elmo's World"

    *to the tune of Jingle Bell (every freaking time)

  4. Asar-Segt gains PowerUp(8): Invisibility
    Save vs. Death: (19)
    Asar-Segt at -10 HP like it ain't no thing.

    Elmo must then RUN to get around the hard corner, provoking ....
    Xann's Opportunity Attack: (11)+2 +2 {CA} -2 {cover} vs. AC 17; miss!

    The last telethrow gibs Asar-Segt completely, Lyth is down to 7 HP, bloodied.

    A creature dies on Elmo's turn (1 thunder damage all round), and then again when Kathra respawns at Location (3).


    1. Wait, how did Asar-Segt get to negative bloodied? He should have been at 5 HP when the round started. Am I missing something?

  5. - Round 2 -
    Asar-Segt second wind's to 6 HP.
    Cookie Monster dies, down to 5 HP.
    Ernie triggers a Demon Mouth Trap, reducing him to -5 HP.

    - Round 3 -
    Elmo telethrows into Asar-Segt, -10 HP.
    Lthy telethrows into Asar-Segt, -15 HP and gibbed.

    1. Ah, I'd missed the demon mouth trap. Thanks.

  6. "Stinks here...smells like used condoms and garbage". Running to the key, Kathra takes out a handaxe and attempts to throw it and rolls

    Move: Run to P3 Stand on the key.
    Free: Mark Oscar as I run by.
    Minor: take out hand axe
    Standard: Throw at Oscar.
    Strength of Stone +6 vs AC
    rolling 1d20+6
    (1)+6 = 7 Humilifuckingation

    I HATE roll20!!!!

    roll the random platform for me

    1. "Hey loser, I demand an OA to add injury to insult... That's a +10 with Virtuous Strike (+10=+8 +2 from CA). And yeah, that's right, it will 1d8+5 damage when I hit your skinny white ass!"

    2. The Count makes a special guest appearance. "My number of the day is...2! And numbers ending with a 2, ah ah ah."

      OA with Virtuous Strike
      (12)+10 = 22 vs AC, hit!
      (2)+5 = 7 damage

      Humiliation teleport. I just numbered them 1 for top left, 2 for bottom left, and 3 for bottom right

  7. The way is shut. The gods keep it, and they decide who enters and who is turned away. The way is shut. Just not to Xann.


    minor: Healing Word on Xann. Healing Surge+[3], gains +2 power bonus to attacks until end of my next turn.

    Declare a double run action: move 1 square south and gain [4]: HASTE. Move to telepad 1, teleport to [4]. [9 of 20 squares used]. Use 7 squares of movement to stand on the key.

  8. No one shall deny Xann!

    The tyrant lord is pleased with his allies' resolve to see him through the portal, so that he may soften up his opponents and prepare them for the inevitable feast to come.

    Dashing through the portal, he grabs the whip, hits the trap and lashes out at the bear slave before, laughing maniacally all the while.


    Move action: Run to F13
    Jump over telethrower with running start (7) and keep running to I15.

    Move action: Run through portal to K10, grabbing the whip as a free action, and continue movement in H8, triggering trap no. 3. (Note: whip description says

    Ernie, Elmo and Cookie Monster are all hit for 10 fire damage, but Ducky gets an OA against Xann.

    Ernie is at 14 hp
    Elmo is at 10
    Cookie Monster loses 10 temp hp, leaving him with 3.

    OA (rolled by Ness): (19)+6 = 25, definitely a hit for (2)+4 = 6 damage

    Xann is at 13, after getting 9 more from Lyth.

    Minor: Magic Missile vs Ducky Bear for 7 damage, triggering the whip which deals 5 to all of Sesame Street and heals all of The Pantheon.

    Ernie is at 9
    Elmo is at 5
    Cookie Monster loses all temp hp and is left with 28 hp
    Oscar goes to 17.

    Lyth heals up to 10
    Kathra up to 33
    Xann up to 18

    ACTION POINT: Magic Missile vs Ducky, for another 7 damage, dropping it to -4 and dealing 5 more to Sesame Street + 5 more healing to The Pantheon.

    Elmo drops to 0
    Ernie to 4
    Cookie Monster to 23
    Oscar to 17.

    Xann heals to 23
    Lyth to 15
    Kathra to 35

    OOC: I assume grabbing the whip mid move is fine, given the text:
    A dungeoneer moving adjacent to the altar may take the whip of pleasure and torment as a free action.

  9. Map updated, waiting on the coming devastation and retribution of COOKIE MONSTER!

    1. Dude, you should get in touch with your inner child. Oscar's next, methinks. :P

    2. I actually spent some of my summers in high school working here: http://www.sesameplace.com/sesame2/

      I blame my Sesame Street character mistake on an unwitting attempt to repress those memories.

  10. “Well, this suck! No good can come of this. Let’s just take the disembodied organ and go to the trash heap (and no, not the one from Fraggle Rock!”

    Move: E3 attempting to jump over the trap switch (4)+1, okay, Oscar triggers trap (2) doing 10 points of damage to thin air.
    Minor: Sing “If I only had a Heart” as the heart burrows in Oscar’s fluffy, green chest.
    Move: to the teleporter at G2 and port to (3) (well that’s progress for you). Step out to K3.
    Free: Sarcastically comment about the most productive turn ever.

  11. Asar-Segt

    The god of sacrifice re-appears and cackles maniacally as he runs into the battle. Throwing himself into the telethrower (after receiving a blessing of speed that WAS HIS DIVINE RIGHT TO RECEIVE!), Asar-Segt sends Elmo tumbling into the Abyss before turning his wrath towards Ernie and the Cookie Monster, sending them both to the hell they so richly deserved for all the time they spent...entertaining and educating children?

    Move: Run to the telethrower in M13 (via the powerup in N11 - 1d10(4) - HASTE)
    - smash into Elmo, who goes flying into the next telethrower and off the ledge (he's unconscious, so no save).
    - continue move onto H5 (provoking an OA from Cookie Monster)
    Standard: Armor of Winter's Grasp vs Ernie: 1d20(17)+5=22 vs Fort 14 [HIT]
    - Damage: 2d6(1)(3)+5=9 damage, Ernie is knocked to -5 HP
    - Effect: Asar-Segt's Fort & AC increase by 2 til the end of the encounter
    Free Action: Dark Reaping on Ernie.
    Minor: Curse Cookie Monster
    Action Point: Grasp of the Iron Tower on Cookie Monster: 1d20(13)+6 vs Fort 13 [HIT]
    - Damage: 2d10(2)(7)+5+1d8(1)+5 (Dark Reaping) + 1d6(4) (Curse) = 24 damage. Cookie Monster is knocked to -1 HP

    K-K-K-K-K-KILLING SPREE! (which doesn't actually exist on this map. *sigh*

    1. BZZZZTT!! Wrong.

      Free Action: (after Asar-Segt moves to H-5) Activate Chaos Device

      iPod can't do Roll20 :(

  12. Elmo's death triggers a wail of 1 thunder damge to all!

    Opportunity Attack: (17)+2 vs. AC 13; hit!
    for (5)+(2)+2 damage! Asar-Segt down to 16 HP.

    Dark Reaping rescinded! Ernie teleports to Location (2) via the chaos device and is on his feet at 3 HP.

    Oh without the Dark Reaping, Cookie Monster is refunded 6 HP to be back on his feet at 4 HP! Oh noes!

    Ernie snatches victory right out of Asar-Segt mummified hands!!! And he now takes his turn.

    1. and in all fairness, i would certainly allow Jon to redo his actions from the point where Ernie teleported away from the attack, if he wants.

    2. Can I just swap the Armor of Winter's Grasp with my ranged basic against Ernie? Assuming I have to keep all the same rolls, it's literally the exact same outcome as before, I just don't have the ongoing effect from Winter's Grasp on me.

    3. Goddamn blogger just ate my fucking post. Fuck!

      Yes. Ernie made the combined mistakes of 1). Not whispering to me when he wants to trigger the chaos device, and 2). triggering it on his own to go off when Asar-Segt moved, but not attacked.

      At minimum damage, Asar-Segt's Eldritch Blast will drop Ernie, gaining Asar-Segt back his Dark Reaping, dropping Cookie Monster as well!

      Ernie dies and Respawns. This is the first death this turn, so I'm about to apply 1 thunder damage to all. Ernie respawns at Location (2), back where he was.

    4. Oh Causality, thou art a heartless bitch...

  13. Ernie appears in the portal, and his felt covering is blasted away by thousands of scarabs, which tear and eat away at Asar-Segt's rotting flesh.

    The scarabs scramble across the trap-switch, tearing at both Cookie Monster and Asar-Segt, before repairing Cookie's blue terry-cloth.

    The muppet reforms with Kevlar-lined felt right in front of Lyth, slicing his plastic sword down upon the goddess! And down she goes, smote upon the keystone. Her fall invigors Oscar, who steps forward with his prize.

    Standard: Fog of Insects, targeting Asar-Segt
       Attack: (4)+2 -2 (cover) +2 (CA) = 6 vs Fort 14 - MISS!
       Miss: half damage - (6)+(10)+2 = 18/2 = 9 damage, leaving Asar-Segt at 6 HP
       Effect: Ernie's defenses increase by 2 for the rest of the match
    Move: run to L-3, activating trap-switch (3)
       Effect: 10 fire/necrotic damage to Cookie Monster and Asar-Segt

    Cookie is at -13 HP, Asar-Segt is at -4 and revenant-dazed

    Free: Shadow Warp activated by Asar-Segt dropping below 0 HP
       Effect: Oscar slides to K-2, teleports to (3), continues sliding to L-3
    Minor: Healing Word on Cookie
       Effect: healed to (3)+7 = 10 HP
    Action Point: charge to O-4, attacking Lyth with Ardent Strike and Holy Smite
       Holy Smite: 6 radiant damage, dazed UENT if attack hits
       Attack: (17)+7 +1 (charge) +2 (CA) = 27 vs AC 18 - HIT!!
       Hit: (3)+4 = 7 damage, dropping Lyth to 0 HP

       Effect: none on this map. sad muppet.

    OOC: commentary on KS... in my mind, it's part of what makes FTDM FTDM.

    1. And with that turn, Ernie reveals that he has Druid, Warlock, Cleric, and Paladin powers. Amazing what the character builder lets you do these days!

      Coming soon (after the tourney) to an Episode Zero post near you!

  14. Cookie Monster is so inspired by Ernie's turn that he feels himself being rejuvenated. However, it leads to him forgetting his current task at hand and he simply flops around on the ground a bit.

    Move: Crawl off of, then back onto powerup, then to I6
    Powerup is (3)

    Minor: Dwarven Resilience
    Heal 7 up to 17 HP and +2 defenses until start of next turn

    Standard: Lesser Aspect of Wrath
    (6)+6-2(prone)+2(CA from dazed) = 12 vs Will, miss
    Effect: Cookie Monster gains 10 THP. Also until end of encounter, Cookie Monster gains +1 attack and enemies that end their turn next to him take 3 radiant damage.

  15. Lyth dropping clears and refreshes Cookie Monster's Oath of Enmity, by the way.


    Round 04 hath been posted: http://www.fourthcoreteamdeathmatch.com/2013/02/play-by-post-match-19-round-04.html